There are two types of people in this world: morning people and those of us who suffer from PMS-Painful Morning Syndrome.
I went onto “Web MD’ and found a list of symptoms to share with you.
Here are a few of the symptoms Web MD listed for PMS:
-Inability to concentrate
-Tearfulness, sadness and depression
That’s me in the morning.
Morning people make mornings painful for the rest of us. As soon as their eyes open, they leap out of bed and can’t wait to start the day. The moment their feet hit the ground they’re all sunshine and peaches. They instantaneously start planning and talking. “We need to make sure we do this, this, and this today. Ohh and what about that? Did that get done yesterday?” Painful.
For those of us suffering from PMS, when we’re asleep we’re all warm and snuggly. No one is bugging us or asking us for things. We are in bliss, until BEEP BEEP BEEP. At first, we think there must be a mistake. But then as the blurry red lines on our alarm clock become all too clear, we sink into the dreadful realization-it’s time. For the next 30 seconds, we go through the seven stages of grief. Fear, anger, denial, and finally, after whapping the alarm clock twenty times-acceptance.
We sit up and our bodies are like, “What are you doing? I wasn’t done sleeping yet!”
“I know! Neither was I.”
Then like the shot that was heard around the world. “Mommy’s up!” “When are we doing this?” “What about that?” “Don’t forget you’re supposed to…” Painful.
I have found that morning people can be a bit snotty about their waking up habits. My phone will ring at 7:45 am on a Saturday morning. They’ll start rambling on and stop and say, “I’m sorry. Did I wake you up? I should have waited to call till 8.” What could possibly happen between 7:45 and 8:00 that could make it all right? Then they’ll say, “Well, I didn’t know because I’ve been up for several hours.”
Let me first say this. 7:00 IS early, as well as 9 or even 10. It doesn’t matter what time it is; if we who are suffering from PMS are woken up by anything other than ourselves it is early. We weren’t done sleeping yet!
I’ve also had morning people make the comment, “Well, why don’t you drink coffee, Stacy?”
Because it’s upstairs, that’s why. I must get up to get it. Unless it is in an IV form on my nightstand next to my bed it’s not going to help me out!
I have been blessed with an entire household of morning people except for my youngest son. He’ll yell, take a swipe at me, then roll over under the blankets and start crying when I wake him up. I always respond, “It’s okay, son. You’re just suffering from PMS.”
So how do you be happy when you’re not a morning person? Sleep through the mornings. Works like a charm.
Stacy Pederson is a Colorado based Humorist and Funny Motivational Speaker who is incessantly insecure with a chronic Thai Food / Netflix binge habit.