Because I Have it all Together, and Other Lies I Want You to Believe About Me

A Christmas Wish

As a funny female speaker, I get to perform a lot, but it’s always so wonderful to have the opportunity to go back to my acting “roots”. I was very thankful to be a part of this project. I believe in the message.

 

Funny Video for Work-from-Home Moms by Humorist Keynote Speaker Stacy Pederson

If you are a work-at-home Mom or Mompreneur-there’s a good chance you know ALL ABOUT, the “Note Under the Door”. Funny Video from Keynote Speaker, Stacy Pederson.

Filmed at “Ambitious Women’s Conference” in Dallas, TX, 2017.

For more of Stacy’s videos you can subscribe to her Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/StacyatMCA

Or like her Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/stacypedersoncomedy

Continue reading “Funny Video for Work-from-Home Moms by Humorist Keynote Speaker Stacy Pederson”

Every Mom on Vacation Ever-Funny Video for Moms

Do your kids fight? As a mom, did you dream that this year’s summer vacation was going to be the best ever?

Now that “summer” has officially ended according to the school system, I can show my true colors about me as a Mom on vacation. I have a feeling, I’m not the only one….

“Every Mom on Vacation-Ever”

For more of Stacy’s videos you can subscribe to her Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/StacyatMCA

Or like her Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/stacypedersoncomedy

Continue reading “Every Mom on Vacation Ever-Funny Video for Moms”

How to Be Happy- Dealing With People Who Are Condescending

Do you have someone in you’re life who you’re never quit sure if they’re being naughty or nice? Someone who says potentially hurtful things in such a polite, smiley way, you can’t tell if they’re being genuinely helpful or hurtful? If they’re being condescending or giving a compliment? Do you ever have that moment where you’re taken aback because you honestly don’t know how to take what was just said?

I do. I’ve never been quick on my feet when it comes to people’s intentions. I tend to see people through a positive lens. Sometimes it’s YEARS later before I finally come to the recognition-that  person was actually being a jerk. What!!??

Perhaps it’s a blessing I’m slow on the uptake. Why? I’m even slower in the moment with a comeback. I’m one of those who, months later at 2 a.m., my head pops of the pillow with the most brilliant reply. Then I have what I call my “Comeback Fantasy” where I get to visualize the entire conversation with me saying what I wish I could have said. And-not to brag or anything-but in my fantasy-I’m freakin’ brilliant.

So what do you do when you have one of those condescending people in your life (assuming you’re forced to be around them by blood, business, or your other BFF’s).

Keep Calm-Smile On: 

-Some people honestly have no idea how they come across. Continue reading “How to Be Happy- Dealing With People Who Are Condescending”

Mommy Needs a Nap-The Truth on How to Get More Sleep

Event Meeting Conference Planner Artist Performer Musician Speaker Humorist Stacy Pederson

 

I suffer from chronic PMS. Painful Morning Syndrome. Symptoms include moodiness, puffiness, fatigue, angry outburst for no reason. That’s me in the morning….and between the hours of 2-4 pm….early evening…the kids’ bedtime….AND anytime my husband gives me “the look” once everyone’s asleep.

Motherhood is code for “DTS-“Death to Sleep”. At your baby shower, they should just hand you boxes of tissues and a bottle of wine to mourn over the loss of anything that resembles rest. I wish someone had pulled me aside and said, “Oh, honey. Motherhood is the most meaningful work you’ll ever do on this planet-but you’ll be so tired you won’t enjoy or remember any of it.”

There have been times where five kids and a comedy career has been anything but funny. I’ve wasted hours on reading tips and tricks on how to get more zzz’s when I should have slept. Here’s my chance to pull you aside and share with you the truth behind my “How to Get More Sleep” favorites.

“Know How Much You Need”: This piece of advice is easily answered. You need more. No matter how much sleep you get, you’ll feel it’s never enough. You’ll just…want….more….

“Make A Sleep Plan”: For those of you who love to make a plan, this will bring you fleeting moments of joy over the idea of taking control in this area of your life. Until, of course, your plan is thwarted by Continue reading “Mommy Needs a Nap-The Truth on How to Get More Sleep”

35 Things for Your Kids to Do in the Summer While You’re Working

 

If there is ever a season for zero productivity, internal rage, self doubt, lack of self control, and overall inadequacy as a Mom-preneur (work from home Mom who is an entrepreneur) -it would be summer. Summertime at my house begins with visions of my children in summer dresses frolicking freely in a flowered meadow. Me- smiling as I watch them contently while sitting on a hand knit wool blanket from Ireland with my laptop resting softly in the shade and money flowing freely into my bank account.  Reality usually sets in sometime within the first week of summer. Reality includes  screaming matches through closed doors at my kids….and me ingesting one….ok sometime two…entire bags of BBQ potato chips while getting some…a little…ok sometimes ZERO work done in an entire day.

I work from home…thankfully….unfortunately…(My kids would give you that exact same response.) Below is my typical summer work day I have expertly honed through the years:

-Go to Wal-Mart. Spend a fortune to have a “cheap” summer. Items include bubbles, sprinklers, plastic baseball bats, bug catchers, sidewalk chalk, kites, and any other shiny bright object that appears to have more than 10 minutes of entertainment value. All items must be foldable, collapsible, etc., as they will end up in a filthy heap in my garage that no one will touch after the first week of June.

-Create schedules, sticker charts, “mommy’s working” note for my office door

-Explain to the children the “rules” of when they can bother me and when they can’t

-Make a calendar of all the fun things we will do when Mommy’s not working

-Close my office door to work…and listen to the children start to fight

-Open the door to find out what’s going on. Get them re-situated. Close the office door and listen to them fight.

-Open the door and bring out a new shiny bright object for them to play with

-Close the door and listen to them play for 2 seconds…then fight

-Open the door, yell, slam something new down on the table for them to play with

-Close the door and listen to them complain that they’re bored

-Open the door, kick them outside

-Close the door and watch them fight outside my office window

-Open the window, scream at them to stop fighting because the neighbors can hear them. Close the window and watch them flop down like dejected sloths melting in summer heat and complain that they’re bored.

-Work for 2 seconds and hear a knock on my window. Listen to them ask me to come back inside. I shake my head no. Repeat 872 times.

-Let them back inside 10 minutes later and watch them collapse in a heap in front of electronics

-Close the door and feel guilty I’m working instead of spending time with my kids

-Open the door to see what they’re watching and make awkward conversation. Feel guilty that I’m spending time with my kids instead of working. Go back in my office and close the door.

-Listen to them fight over electronics. Open the door and scream at them they’re lucky they don’t live in a 3rd world country. Give them a lecture. Make them do a chore.

-Go back in the office. Feel guilty. Stress eat. Glance at the time. It’s 9:17 am.

-Repeat hourly…for three months.

I decided I needed some work  “productivity hacks” that were better than what’s previously listed when it came to keeping my kids entertained for little or no money while I worked. I did some extensive scientific research…by posting a sign on my Facebook page…for advice. Here are a few of my favorites from friends and some from “SuperMoms” on the Internet who lie about how perfect their parenting skills/home/and children are:

  1. Library Summer Programs
  2. Geocaching OR painting and finding rocks. Here is an example:
  3. https://www.facebook.com/groups/300625560293159/?fref=mentions
  4. Vacation Bible School (Lots of churches host these and they are extremely inexpensive and a lot of fun. Look for giant VBS signs when you’re driving outside church buildings.)
  5. YMCA-(Usually have internet so you can work while kids swim, do programs, etc. Ours has a coffee shop so I can actually host meetings, too.)
  6. Art Club
  7. Sports Camps through non-profits
  8. Go for evening walks
  9. Flex your work hours to fit in fun
  10. Hiking, biking, swimming, anything that’ll wear them out physically. J
  11. Make summer books. (Love this.)
  12. Use 50% off regular item coupons from craft stores.
  13. Make slime. http://littlebinsforlittlehands.com/homemade-slime-recipe/
  14. Have them make a movie or video with smart phone then watch at dinnertime. Let them use costumes, music, edit, etc.
  15. Match reading hours for Youtube/Video game hours. Example: for every 30 minutes of reading-they get 1 hour of Youtube.
  16. Set up the big tent in the living room. Let them do “camping” overnight.
  17. Have them make homemade board game. Check Pinterest for lots of ideas.
  18. Check local bowling alleys and skating rings for free or nearly free summer bowling programs for kids. Lots have Wi-Fi.
  19. Free E-book for kids on Amazon
  20. Free Lego club for kids
  21. Home Depot, Lowes and Michaels free or nearly free classes for kids
  22. “Photo Walk” through Apple
  23. Microsoft Youth Spark
  24. Whole Foods Kids Cooking Class
  25. Bass Pro Shop Summer Camp
  26. Chores
  27. Volunteer to help an elderly neighbor with their yard. (Can get list of “shut-ins” from local fire department)
  28. Search for local free or nearly free day art camps
  29. Free summer movie nights in the park
  30. Sprinkler
  31. Homemade slip-n-slide
  32. Good ol’ fashioned bubbles
  33. Free printables for kids http://funcheaporfree.com/2016/06/100-summer-activities-for-kids-free-printable-included
  34. Babysitting Co-op
  35. Work while you vacation. I do this A LOT. We’ve spent over a month on the road so far this summer. There’s wifi pretty much everywhere if I need it. I schedule certain days to work where the kids are at the pool/beach, etc. and certain days for fun. OR work in mornings, play in the afternoons. I use this to book my travel: http://bucketlistvacations.tripspin.com/snap
  36. Hire a “Mommy’s Helper” for a few hours each morning, Cheaper than a babysitter or nanny.

*Bonus: #36. Become independently wealthy. Hire 12 nannies. Fly them all to Paris with the kids for the Summer while I get numerous plastic surgery procedures done. Facetime them periodically…so I can listen to them fight. Then hang up and let the Nannies deal with it.

I have found these mindsets helpful:

-Remember kids don’t need to be “entertained” twenty-four seven. It’s good for them to figure out what to do on their own when they’re bored.

-I automatically know summer will not be my most productive months. I try to remember that when I’m feeling guilty about not getting tons done. My kids are only hear for so many years, and I want to spend time with them as much as I can…well-I MAY have moments where I want to spend time as little as I can…but for the most part-I want to be with them and I need to plan my work year accordingly.

-Boundaries are ok. It’s good to lead by example and show the kids the value of working hard. They learn by watching what you do, not by listening to what you say. If you want your kids to know how to work, you yourself have got to do it.

-Give yourself grace. We all have “Mommy Meltdowns” behind closed doors. There’s no such thing as a “SuperMom”. We’re human and we fail. That’s ok.

-Support one another in our Mommy endeavors. No haters needed. Mom’s hate themselves already. We don’t need other people pointing out our imperfections. Find a supportive group you can be real with, encourage each other and help each other out.

Now-if you’ll excuse me. I need to open my office door and yell.

Stacy Pederson Funny Motivational Inspirational Humorist Speaker

Stacy Pederson is a Colorado based Humorist and Funny Motivational Speaker who is incessantly insecure with a chronic Thai Food / Netflix binge habit.

StacyPederson.com

Top 19 Confusing “Motivational” Quotes / Tweets to Mess With Your Followers

 

Seems everyone has an Inspirational / Motivational quote they plaster all over their social media. Have you ever read a motivational quote that made absolutely no sense? 

I had to get in on the fun.

Here’s 19 “Motivational” / “Inspirational” quotes you can use just to mess with your followers: …(Why 19? Just to mess with those of you who need it to be 20…)

 

 

 

“LOVE is a 4 letter word that spells ‘LOVE'”

 

“My Darkest Hour is When it Dawned on Me I Had Been Kept in the Dark.”

 

“Tomorrow is another day. Different than today. Tomorrow will become today and today yesterday…don’t worry about that part.”

 

“Live everyday as if it were your last-because-if I had it my way it would be.”

 

“Failing forward gives you momentum-even though it’s face down.”

 

“Whoever laughs at you when you fall, is probable a PE teacher.”

“A journey of 1000 miles begins with a single tweet or snapchat post.”

 

 

“Dance as if everyone’s drinking.”

 

Enjoy the little things in life because, if you’re a millennial, it’s probably all you can afford.”

“Perfection is only a path mediocre people take. Perfect people don’t need a path.”

 

“Be yourself…only better.”

 

“Success does not come from winning. It comes from really good P.R.”

 

“Keep your chin up, your head held high, and your best foot forward. It makes you look better in your pics.”

“Happiness comes when your automatic deposit is no longer pending.”

 

“Life is like football. It requires hard work, sacrifice, dedication, and an occasional $20 million contract.”

“Only losers understand the true value of a win.”

 

“I have found if you genuinely love life-you’re a little off.”

 

“To live is to let go. So hold on tight to your dreams.”

 

“Beware of a man who is charming. Charm is spelled ‘C-Harm'”.

 

Stacy Pederson is a Colorado based Humorist and Funny Motivational Speaker who is incessantly insecure with a chronic Thai Food / Netflix binge habit.

StacyPederson.com

 

 

 

How to Write an Epic Blog Post in 7 Easy Steps + 10 More

Stacy Pederson Funny Motivational Speaker

 

So you want to be a writer. Better yet a blogger. An EPIC blogger. Prose flowing means money growing. Here’s a simple 17 step plan millions of bloggers have used to write their first epic post:

  1. Spend anywhere from 1 hour to 10 years on developing the right kind of blog your passionate about. A topic that will stick with you like cellulite or your worse junior high memory.

 

  1. Make a decision to finally write your blog post. This usually happens “in the moment” after something disastrous in your life happens. A break up, job loss, 40th birthday…credit card statement comes due.

Continue reading “How to Write an Epic Blog Post in 7 Easy Steps + 10 More”

How to Be Happy at Work- Eat a Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich

Peanut bHow to Be Happy at Workutter and jelly. It’s hard to imagine one without the other. Peanut butter alone between two pieces of bread. Jelly alone between two pieces of bread. Not delish. Together? FABULOUS!

It’s difficult to understand why two separate items from opposite ends of the spectrum could work so well together. Peanut butter: a root, under the ground, plain colored, in a shell. Jelly: made from colorful fruit, above ground, pretty and sweet.

What’s this have to do with happiness? Happiness and work.

The two seem polar opposite. One entails visions of flitting around in fields or lounging on a beach. The other entails the ugly, under the ground, boring, day-to-day grind. Don’t we work hard so that one day we won’t have to work hard, so that we can finally do what we want, so that we can finally be happy?

If you want to live a happy life you’re going to have to smash work and happiness together. On one end lies birth. The other end lies-death. All that life in the middle is an intermixed mess of work and your happiness.

Here’s What Work Does for You:

Flow factor. Here’ a fantastic Ted X talk on Happiness and “Flow”. goo.gl/p4V1MI

I’ll give you the movie trailer version. Scene zooms in. There’s you at work immersed in a task. You’re in the height of problem solving and progress. You suddenly look up dazed and confused because you’ve completely lost track of time. That’s flow. Well…that’s the highlight of flow. (You’ll have to watch the full length version if you want to know more.) Flow makes you happy. Rated “E” for everyone. Available for you to stream immediately.

Belonging. One good co-worker, a client that you love, a boss that you can help. We are social beings. YES-there are those you’d be fine NEVER SEEING AGAIN. However, perusing around at home day in and day out working alone does not make you happy. Don’t argue with me if you don’t like that last sentence. Argue with science.

Sense of Purpose. We all need a sense of purpose or long-term goal that is not “me” oriented. You are a part of something bigger at work. And NO it’s not just about money. You are helping your company or organization contribute something that is needed in the market place. If it wasn’t, you wouldn’t be in business. Think bigger, though. People need their jobs. Your co-workers have families. They need food in their stomach, gas in their tank and a roof over their head. By you doing your job well you are contributing to their lives by helping ensure you all have a place to work at tomorrow.

Security. Unfortunately, as much as my artist heart hates to admit it, we all need money to survive. I’ve not been able to work on a few different occasions and, at one point, lost everything. It’s not fun. It’s not fun being in a place where you are unable to pay your rent or buy your kid’s shoes. The security of knowing you will have a paycheck GREATLY contributes to your overall well-being and ultimate happiness.

The happiest people I’ve known have always worked in one way or another. My Dad is a great example. He retired three years early, taking a smaller retirement, so he could work. He volunteers all of his time building or repairing homes for people who need it. Flood damage, tornadoes, or just a family who’s trying to build a home on a minimal budget. My Dad lives simple, in a very modest home he built himself, on a very limited budget, and is one of the happiest people I’ve ever known. The only time I’ve seen him miserable in the last 15 years is when he had cancer and wasn’t able to “work”.

If you want happiness, think of a PB & J. Makes no sense why it’s so good. A good life requires work.  A happy life requires work.

One last thought, for those who think PB & J is not so great, it was once only enjoyed by the very wealthy and served at the finest restaurants.  If you lived a hundred years ago you’d really think this sandwich was something. Hope you enjoy one on your lunch hour today.

Stacy Pederson  is a Colorado based Humorist and Funny Motivational Speaker who is incessantly insecure with a chronic Thai Food / Netflix binge habit.

StacyPederson.com

Top 5 Things That Help You Look Like Less of an Idiot While Conducting Business in a Coffee Shop

Top 5 Things That Help You Look Like Less of an Idiot While Conducting Business in a Coffee Shop I admit I’m a late bloomer when it comes to being an urban, hip, cool, “my office is a coffee shop,” “I only own a Mac” kind of person.  I’ve avoided coffee shops in the past because…I’m broke…but I also found them intimidating. (It was really the “I’m broke” part that kept me out.) I’ve secretly peered into coffee shop windows where I observed hordes of trendy, skinny-jeaned  people typing effortlessly. Something about their not really fixed but perfectly fixed gelled hair, flannel shirts, and whiffs of espresso made their lives seem significantly more put together than mine. I’ve recently stumbled into the world of comedy writing. Out of complete panic of deadliness and sheer lunacy at home, I’ve found myself plunked between the business guy who talks too loud and the goth teen who shouldn’t be drinking caffeine. Continue reading “Top 5 Things That Help You Look Like Less of an Idiot While Conducting Business in a Coffee Shop”